Who is the most important person in your life, and why?

This is a thought provoking question. And it’s present tense; who is the most important person in your life -NOW. I did a little research on the definition of “most important person” and came up with: “The most important person in my life is someone who makes the biggest impact and would be missed the most if they were gone.” Further then, the question is WHY would they be missed the most? Shared history, children and grandchildren, the understanding of each other’s nature, a general acceptance of the other and a willingness to work through challenges are some very common items that came up in my research. I would add to that common beliefs and goals,

a willingness to let each other be the best person they can be, and a deep bond of love and affection.

I’ll get back to WHO that other person is in my life, but now I will do an “ about face” and say that the most important person in my life has to be me. For most of us our daily needs take precedence over any other person’s needs in our life. Common sense tells us that we must be the most important person in our life because we must take care of our health, daily ablutions, feeding ourselves and other activities of daily living before we could even begin to look at others as more important. For those folks that experience some form of disability, I would argue that the most important person in their life must be their care givers. Those care givers are essential to enable that person to even sustain life.

I have been involved, over the years, with various non profit organizations that support care giving to disabled people. Multiple Sclerosis and Parkinson’s are the two that I have had direct involvement. Also, and unfortunately, there are and have been others I have known well who have fallen victim to disease or health issues that have required nursing home care. That experience serves to affirm that, in their lives, the care givers are the most important people. And thank the good Lord for granting His Grace to them for their willingness to do this heroic work.

So back to the original premise of the question asked. Who is the most important person, other than yourself, in your life?

For me, Connie is the most important person in my life, given what I have written in the first paragraph. I could, perhaps, be more flowery in my description as to why she is. So because of that, I ask for her forgiveness. Our marriage has lasted for over 50 years. We’ve clearly beaten the odds since only about 6% of marriages last for that length of time. Without most, if not all, of the attributes I discussed above about the WHY, I am certain our marriage would not have survived. It could only have lasted because we are the most important “other” person in each others life.

I think it needs to be said that our lives are, hopefully, filled with many important people. And I would also argue that, at times, the most important person in our lives may be a parent, a brother, sister, friend, priest and so on. Remembering the famous line attributed to Rose Kennedy when asked “ which of your 9 children did you love the most?” Her answer was “whichever one needed it at the time.” I think it works the same way in all our lives. Our pressing needs come and go. And it’s those very important people in our lives who help us meet and then overcome those needs.

I am blessed and thankful for my bride of 50 years and for all the “other” most important people in my life.